Howard's Award
by Darien Fawkes
Summary: Howard is being honoured by NASA for his contributions to space exploration, but his new found fame brings someone into his life that will cause a lot of old wounds to open.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: **This is my first attempt at a Big Bang Theory fanfic. Let me know what you think, and more importantly, if you want it to continue.

**Legal:** I do not own The Big Bang Theory, or the associated rights, characters, names, events etc. Anything not owned by the above rights is to be presumed purely the creation of the author.

**Rating: **T – there will be adult themes and language in places.

It was early evening, and the whole gang was sitting in the apartment Leaonard and Sheldon shared, going through the motions of watching another movie. As usual, although most of them wanted to go out for the evening, Sheldon's obsessive need for order meant that he point-blank refused to violate the set-in-stone tradition of "movie night", the tradition whereby every first Saturday of the month, they would watch a DVD at the apartment with a large platter of nachos and cheese. Amy just let out a sigh.

"Of course, this is completely preposterous!" Amy exclaimed, seeing the image of the Red Skull revealing his true face on the screen. "If the treatment DID cause all the skin on his face to come off, then he'd succumb quickly to the ravages of gangrene! Never mind Super Soldier, he'd be lucky if he could breathe on his own."

"Amy, you forget, these movies don't need to follow the exact rules of science." Sheldon stated, earning a look from the others. "It's a work of fiction, the rules of the real world don't necessarily need to apply."

"So says the man who gave us a four hour lecture on why Superman should have let Lois Lane become pavement pizza." Raj replied sarcastically. Sheldon just glared at him.

"That was physics, a real science where the rules are absolute!" Sheldon put down with no hint of irony in his voice. No one was really sure anymore if he didn't get sarcasm or if he just blissfully ignored it when it was levelled his way. In truth, none of them really cared. It was easier and quicker just to ignore it than to try and correct him. "This is biology, a science where less than a hundred years ago, it was still considered a good idea to give cold baths to patients with pneumonia."

"And yet he has absolutely no problem with the sound effects of space ships blowing up in Star Trek." Penny muttered. Sheldon just looked to her.

"That doesn't count, that's a classic." He told her. Just then, the phone rang. They all just stared at it.

"Someone should get that." Sheldon said with absolutely no hint of irony.

"Don't all get up at once, I'll get it." Raj sighed as he pulled himself off the floor. "Of course, the Indian guy sitting on the floor has to get it. Let's not inconvenience all the people sitting on nice soft chairs."

He picked up the phone while the others continued to eat their snacks.

"Hello, this is the Hoffsteader-Cooper residence..."

"Excuse me!" Sheldon piped up. Raj just sighed.

"OK, the Cooper-Hofsteader residence." He corrected himself. "Yes, he's here...I forgot about his crazy name-priority rule for answering the phone."

"Who is it?" Penny asked as she picked up some nachos, washing down her last mouthful with some beer. Raj just looked at her.

"It's Principal Seaburt." He replied. "Yes, I'm still here...yes, he's here..."

"What is it?" Bernadette asked. Raj just held the phone to his chest.

"He wants to talk to Howard." He told them. Howard just took a swig of his beer before heading over to the phone, taking it from Raj.

"This is Howard Wollowitz." He greeted him, a little surprised to be getting a call at Leonard's place.

"Wolowitz, I've been looking for you all night, I tried at your place, and your mother's. She said you'd probably be here." He began. "There's something really important we need to discuss."

"Hold on just one second." Howard said as he hit the silence button. He looked to the others. "OK, which one of you ratted me out!"

"Howard, if I'd ratted you out, don't you think you'd be in a federal prison right now?" Sheldon asked him.

"Ratted you out for what?" Leonard asked, ignoring Sheldon. It was true that Howard had pulled some stuff in the past that probably WOULD constitute a threat to National Security, including using a spy drone to find the America's Next Top Model house.

"I don't know but he's calling around to find me!" He replied.

"Why don't you ask him what he wants?" Bernadette asked him. He just took a deep breath and went back to the phone.

"Can I ask what it's about?" He asked. He listened as he got an explaination. "Really? Oh...yes, I can be there...just...I'll do it. Thank you."

He hung up the phone, seeing the others staring at him.

"Well, don't keep us waiting, what was that about?" Penny asked him. "When are the Feds coming?"

"They're not." Howard replied. "Principal Seaburt got a call from NASA."

"Did your crapper blow up again?" Raj asked. He just shook his head.

"They...they're honouring me for my contributions to the International Space Station." He told them. "They're launching a new satellite next week. They're naming it after me."

"Howie, that's wonderful news!" Bernadette exclaimed loudly as she threw herself at him, hugging him tightly. Everyone but Sheldon followed suit quickly. Howard looked to him with a huge grin.

"What, are you jealous or something?" He asked.

"No, I just don't like touching people." Sheldon replied honestly. The others just ignored him and carried on congratulating Howard on this new honour.

Almost a week later, the gang were at Howard's place, attending a party that he and Bernadette had thrown to celebrate the launch. Although the University was holding a ceremony later, Howard had insisted on inviting his friends around to his place. He was just lighting some candles as Bernadette came out of their room in a flowing ball gown. He stood breathless for a moment seeing her.

"Wow." He finally managed to say. "You look incredible."

"You should see what I've got on underneath." She replied cheekily. Howard just pulled her in, kissing her softly. They parted as they heard the doorbell.

"I guess Sheldon's not first for once." She commented. Just then, they heard a knock on the door.

"Howard." He stated, knocking again. "Howard." He knocked again. "Howard."

"You had to say it didn't you?" He teased her. He went over, opening the door, finding the whole gang outside.

"Hey, it's the man of the hour!" Penny greeted him, hugging Howard tightly as they started to file into the house.

"Are you sure we can have this meal?" Leonard asked, putting the take-out on the table. "I mean, it's not exactly Kosher..."

"I'm taking full advantage of the fact my mom is at home." Howard told them. "What she doesn't know won't hurt me, so break out the Won Ton Soup I say!"

"We even had a spot set up for you Sheldon." Bernadette told him. "Not too far from the window to be hot..."

"Oh, there's no need to put yourselves out, never let it be said I'm fussy." He replied. Everyone just fell silent in disbelief at this statement. Sheldon sat down, staring at them. "There's no need to be unsociable, sit down."

"OK then." Penny replied as she took a seat, unable to believe the words coming from Sheldon's mouth. As they all sat down, Leonard popped the cork on a champagne bottle and started to pour and hand out glasses.

"Wow, Dom Perrignon? Are you serious?" Howard asked. "Leonard, this must have cost a fortune!"

"Well, how often does one of my best friends get honoured with a permanent monument to their contributions to engineering?" Leonard asked.

"Actually, it won't be permanent, the satellite will be on a concentric orbit meaning that it will burn up on re-entering the atmosphere in 137 years." Sheldon replied. Everyone just breathed a collective sigh.

"There it is." Leonard commented. Sheldon just got up, holding his glass.

"I'm sorry Howard, I admit that was jealousy speaking." He replied. "I know it's difficult for me to admit at times that your practical skills and creations sometimes overshadow my own theoretical works, but I just wanted to take a moment if I may to say something."

He looked around the room, seeing the others staring at him.

"Howard, you are a fine engineer, and your works have benefitted the scientific community in ways I envy." Sheldon admitted. "This honour is richly deserved."

"Wow." Raj stated. "He actually said something nice."

"Sheldon, that was beautiful." Bernadette told him. Sheldon stood for a moment, uncertain what else to do. He just held up his glass.

"To Howard Wolowitz." He declared. "Even without a PhD, he's a national treasure."

"And there it is." Howard replied with a small grin as they all tapped glasses. "Thanks Sheldon."

Just then, there was a knock at the door. Everyone looked around, staring at the door. Raj took a quick head-count.

"Um...we're all here right?" He asked.

"I guess I'm getting that." Penny replied as she got up, taking a slice of prawn toast and heading to the door as everyone else carried on with their meal. She opened the door, finding a man standing outside.

He was a couple of inches shorter than her, with a balding head, what little hair he had around the back and sides was pure white. He had a long, pointed nose, and thick glasses. He was wearing a Pringle sweatshirt and suit pants, with loafers.

"Hi, can I help you?" Penny asked.

"Yes, I'm here to see Howard Wolowitz, I was told he was here." The man replied, trying to see past her, looking to the room. Penny just took another bite.

"So, who should I say is here?" She asked.

"My name's Gerald Wolowitz." He replied.

"Wolowitz?" She asked. "As in...?"

She looked into the room, seeing that everyone was staring wordlessly. They all looked to Howard, not knowing what to say. He got up, and headed over to the door, gesturing Penny to leave. He stood for a moment, before slamming the door shut in the man's face so hard the whole wall shook. It shook so violently that the autographed picture of Neil Armstrong next to the door fell off, the glass shattering as it landed. He walked back to the table and sat down.

"Howard..."

"Can someone pass the sweet and sour pork balls?" He asked, interrupting Penny.

"Howie..."

"I'd like some sweet and sour pork." He reiterated, cutting off his wife. She handed him the container, and everyone just carried on with their meal, not really knowing what to say. The rest of the night was decidedly quiet.


	2. Howard's Reaction

The following morning, Penny stopped in at the Cheesecake Factory for a bagel and some coffee on her way to the set. Although her acting career hadn't QUITE taken off like she had expected when she quit, she still had fairly regular work. It was mostly commercials, infomercials and the occasional bit-part in TV shows, but she was earning enough to make a steady living. After the uncomfortable scene the previous night at Howard's place she didn't feel much like cooking, but if she was honest, there was a part of her that liked coming back to the Factory, just to remind some of her former co-workers that she had gotten out.

As she received her order, a lightly toasted smoked salmon and cream cheese bagel with a large latte, she noticed Bernadette sitting at one of the tables with a similar order...one that had remained pretty much untouched by the looks of things. Penny went over to the table, sitting down with her, and looked to her friend and former co-worker.

"I think you're meant to drink it before it gets cold." Penny commented. "You know...assuming it isn't an iced coffee."

"It wasn't meant to be." Bernadette sighed, pushing the cup away from herself. Penny just looked at her.

"I'm guessing things didn't get much better after we left?" She asked. It was basically the elephant in the room. What was meant to be a party to celebrate the launch of a satellite that would bear Howard's name had quickly become a very quiet and awkward evening due to the unexpected arrival of Howard's dad. Although Howard had slammed the door on him, the atmosphere after that was more than a little frosty, and no one was really in much of a mood to celebrate. Bernadette just let out a little sigh.

"He never said a word all night after you all left." She confirmed. "When I woke up, he had already gone to the University. He left a note saying he had gone to work."

Penny didn't know how to respond, just taking a sip out of her coffee. She had known Howard a long time, and in all that time, through all the trials and tribulations, despite all the bravado he put up, she had come to know that he wasn't as bullet-proof as he liked to let on. Things got to him, and when they did, sometimes it wasn't easy for him to deal with it. She could still remember consoling him when she called him creepy and pathetic...albeit on that occasion she ended up punching him in the face when he tried to kiss her! She knew that he had a vulnerable side.

"I'm worried about him." Bernadette told her. "His dad just showed up out of the blue? Now?"

"You're surprised?" Penny asked her. "I mean...Howard is in most of the local papers. He's probably going to get the chat-show offers soon..."

"It's not like that hadn't occurred to me. I know the timing is pretty convenient." Bernadette replied. "I just can't help worrying about what it's doing to him. He won't talk to me."

"I guess his dad coming back is a pretty big deal." Penny conceded. "Maybe all he needs is some space to work things out."

"I know, I'm just worried." Bernadette told her.

"Hey, he's at the University, the guys are there right?" Penny reminded her. "It's not like he's on his own. If he needs to talk, they'll be there."

Over at the university, Howard was looking at a clip board as Leonard, Sheldon and Raj got there. Leonard was the first to approach him.

"You got here early." He commented. "We tried to reach you at your place."

"I have a lot of work on." Howard replied, gesturing to the post-grad students in the room. "I was asked to take them through a simulated launch."

"Well...that's...that's great." Leonard replied a little uneasily. He could understand why he was trying to bury himself in work. His own mother had caused him enough trauma that the metaphorical psychological scar tissue was taller than him. He understood why he didn't really want to talk about the previous night. "Um...listen Howard; we just wanted to talk about..."

"Hold that thought." Howard said as he was shaking his head in disbelief. He went to the post-grad students in the lab, walking up to one of them in particular. He tapped the kid, who was actually bigger than him by a significant margin on the shoulder, at which he just glared at him, tapping the clip board.

"What the hell is this?" He asked. The student just shrugged.

"It's the calculations for the re-entry." He answered. Howard put his hands on his hips and took a deep breath.

"So tell me, was your major engineering or Lego Technic or Meccano?" He asked.

"I'm sorry?" The student asked, looking far from happy. Howard slammed down the clip board.

"These readings are all over the place! The most accurate reading you have is off by a factor of 10 degrees!" Howard responded. "You do realise that we're calculating re-entry trajectories right?"

"Yes Mr..."

"So if they're off by even a few degrees, you'll be responsible for the deaths of an entire crew!" Howard cut off the student. "

"I...I'm sorry..."

"If the entry angle is too shallow, the shuttle will bounce off the atmosphere and ricochet into space, losing fuel and hull integrity, if they're lucky, the impact will kill them, other than that they have death by asphyxiation to look forward to!" Howard barked at him. "If it's too steep, it'll slam into air pressure so dense that it'll be like slamming into a brick wall at Mach 1, and NASA will have to scrape what's left of them out of the shuttle to give back to their families!"

"I...I'll...correct..."

"And this paperwork looks like...would you like a set of crayons to write up your next version?" Howard asked. "I'd say it looks like it's been written by a five-year-old, but that would be an insult to five-year-olds!"

He thrust the clip-board into the student's hands, before pointing to the door.

"Go and do it again! Come back when you stop being a dumbass!" He snapped. He looked to the others. "In fact...just all of you go!"

They all filed out of the room past Leonard, Raj and Sheldon. Howard saw them, but went back to work.

"Don't you think you were a little hard on them?" Leonard asked.

"I'm sure the families of any astronauts on the shuttle they were supposed to be guiding wouldn't think so." Howard responded curtly. "Despite the jokes, NASA does not stand for Need Another Seven Astronauts."

"Dude, they're post-grads. It's only a simulation they're running." Raj reminded him. "It's not like there are real astronauts..."

"But one day there might be, and if those idiots get their diplomas, a whole team's lives might be in their hands!" Howard told him. Leonard and Raj just backed off, knowing that he wasn't really angry with the students. Yes, they had made mistakes, but that was why they were there. The mission they were observing was a simulation. It wasn't real; there were no lives at stake. The worst that would happen was that they would get a failing grade if they didn't complete the simulation.

"He has a point." Sheldon said, earning a glare from Leonard. "Their mis-calculations could cost lives if they're put on a real mission."

"Howard, they're just students. They're here to learn, not have their heads bitten off." Leonard reminded him. Howard ignored him, continuing to work. "Look, what happened last night..."

"What about last night?" Howard asked. "A shuttle launch went off without a hitch because the team wasn't made up of a veritable who's who of incompetent idiots?"

"I think he was meaning the impromptu arrival of your estranged father." Sheldon interjected. Howard just stopped what he was doing, clutching the edges of his desk like he was considering picking it up and using a weapon.

"I...don't...have...a...father." He said slowly.

"Well logic dictates..."

"I SAID I DON'T HAVE A FATHER!" Howard interrupted Sheldon. "Now, I can't speak for the rest of you but I have work to do."

"Howard." Raj pleaded with him. They could all see his plea was falling on deaf ears though. As the post-grad students returned cautiously, they all took the opportunity to leave, resolving to speak to him later, perhaps when he had calmed down a little.

Later that night, Sheldon walked into the Cheesecake Factory, intending to buy some take-out. His...eccentricities...meant that it was nearly impossible for him to break from his routine, but when none of them had seen Howard at lunch, it was clear he wasn't going to meet them at the Cheesecake Factory for their usual Wednesday meal out.

It sent a chill through him, and he could feel a little ache in the side of his head, approaching the counter. Breaking from his routine caused him discomfort, real, tangible issues. He could still remember feeling so ill he could barely eat the time Leonard brought home Thai Supreme instead of Thai Palace, but on this occasion, the discomfort was preferable to the alternative. He didn't feel like he needed to claw off his own skin at ordering his meal to go, likely needing to re-heat it in the microwave back home because of the 23 minute walk back to his apartment.

"Two burgers, one with all the salad and sides in a separate container and two large portions of fries please." Sheldon stated. The girl at the counter just looked at him curiously.

"Don't you normally eat in?" She asked.

"They say a change is as good as a holiday, but I hate those too." Sheldon replied. She just shrugged.

"Well, I guess you'll be eating a little later than usual for once." She replied.

"Oh, you and my morning bowel movements are more than aware of that." Sheldon responded. The waitress just pointed to the bar, a look of disgust on her face.

"You can have a drink while you're waiting." She told him. Sheldon just went over, finding to his surprise that Howard was there. He was sitting on a stool, with a glass in his hand. He put it down, sliding it back to the barmaid.

"Another bourbon when you get the chance please." He stated. Sheldon came across, sitting with him.

"I'd like a diet coke." He added. He looked to Howard, who didn't even seem to acknowledge that he was there. "Howard...we didn't think you were coming out for dinner."

"I wasn't, I came out for a few drinks." He responded. "The trained monkeys only cost me THREE hours of my own time cleaning up their mistakes."

"This is why I strenuously opposed Principal Seaburt's efforts to put post graduate students on my research." Sheldon told him as the bar maid came back with the drinks. Sheldon handed over some money for them. "He only took a year to get the message...I haven't had an offer in the last three years, for which I'm thankful."

"Sheldon, what are you doing here?" He asked.

"I'm ordering food to take home because we're not eating in tonight." Sheldon responded. "What are you doing here? I'm sure Bernadette..."

"Bernie only wants to talk about...you know..." Howard responded. Sheldon just looked to him blankly. "Of course not, look who I'm talking to."

Before he could answer though, another person sat down next to them. It was Gerald. He looked like he had been wandering around all day by the looks of his clothes. He gestured to the bar maid.

"Two bourbon and...whatever this one was having." He told her. Howard just tensed up, hearing his voice. "I went to the university today..."

"I know you did, I got the message from the front desk." Howard replied coldly. Sheldon just sat wordlessly as Gerald looked to him.

"Look, Howard, I know I've been selfish..."

"Selfish, is that what you call it?" Howard asked. "When you walked out on your wife and your 8-year-old son without so much as a word, that's the only word you can come up with is it? Selfish?"

"Howard, you have every right to be angry..."

"You have no right to tell me what I should or shouldn't be feeling." Howard stated, downing both drinks quickly. "Now, I have a wife to go home to...but I guess that's not something you understand is it?"

With that, he stormed out. Gerald just looked defeated, seeing his son leaving. Sheldon finished his drink.

"You're his friend aren't you?" Gerald asked. Sheldon just looked at him.

"Yes, I am." He answered.

"Can you talk to him for me?" He asked. "Can you ask him to meet with me?"

"I think Howard has made his feelings on that subject quite clear." Sheldon responded as someone put a bag down next to him. "Now if you'll excuse me, I need to take this food home, re-heat it, and hope that it doesn't cause me too much discomfort."

"Please, I'm begging you!" Gerald called out. "I need to talk to him, to put things right!"

"You've had over twenty years to do that." Sheldon stated. "Why should I help you now?"

He started to walk away, but as he got to the door, Gerald called out to him.

"If I don't make things right now, I possibly won't have time to!" Gerald stated. "I'm dying!"

Sheldon stopped in his tracks. Hearing this hit him hard; he had lost his own father when he was young.

"I have colonic cancer." He told Sheldon. "The doctors...they think I have six months, maybe eight."

Sheldon turned back to face him.

"You're dying?" He asked. Gerald just nodded.

"I really want to make things right before the end." He told Sheldon. "Please, can you talk to Howard?"

"I can't promise he'll meet you, but I will speak to him." Sheldon answered. "I'm sorry for your condition."

With that, he left the Cheesecake Factory, heading for home.


End file.
